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Post by dream on Dec 21, 2010 11:51:14 GMT -6
december third, 2013 ringing out like a shotgun in my head
ringing out and i just can't go to bed [/color][/center] dear diary, The third day of December, it's weird how time seems to fly by, doesn't it? Especially even when you have eternity on this world, you'd think that time would pass slower. Well, maybe it's because finally, Azrael came back. He's been gone for over five decades, I don't know what happened to him. He basically said he'd been in Hell. Wonderful, that could only mean one thing, they wanted to kill him - which they didn't, so that means only one other thing, they wanted something from him. My guess, information. On what though? There are plenty of other Archangels out there. Either way, I'm so happy he's back, but now that he's back, it's starting to raise some questions, worries me. He's back, and I realized just how much I had actually missed him. Az has said how much he really missed me. Then it got complicated. Damn these emotions!
I wish I really hadn't watched the humans over the past 500 years, life would be so much easier, though anger is a good one to have, yet I harbor it deep in my system, I know that it will help me survive if I keep it. I wield it dangerously, since I know who killed my adoptive parents, the Nephilim and Deva. They didn't die from natural causes, this they told me when I brought them back, it had been a pack of rogue demons who killed half-breeds, thinking they are a shame to the races. I'm one of those. They will pay.
[scribbling in another language, probably Latin]
Right now, Az is resting on the couch, and I'm here, waiting for him to wake up and be better. What is going to happen? I feel something for him, something I hadn't felt in such a long time, I'm not even sure if it's the same thing. And that's what scares me. It feels like the same thing, but it doesn't at the same time. Does that make sense? I don't know, maybe I'm reading too much into it, but it does feel different. Quite. It feels much...stronger. Yes, that's what it is. It's stronger and that's what scares me. I don't know what will happen between us, but I do know that I don't want to lose him ever again, and I will kill anyone who even dares to try and hurt him, I don't care if he says I shouldn't fight.
I will fight for him.
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Post by dream on Dec 21, 2010 20:29:41 GMT -6
december seventh, 2013 dear diary, The reason why I haven't written in a few days, is because I've been getting adjusted, as I'm sure Marshal has been too. Oh Marshal? Yeah, he's another Invictus. I know right?! I can't believe that I've finally found another one like me, after all these centuries, I can't believe I found a 10-year-old Invictus. He's so adorable, I feel like an older-sister, mother type to him, and I know we just have this nice connection...I really do love Marshal, but not in that creepy way, just like a good friend type of way, you know? I think him being an Invictus probably doesn't hurt that either. We met in the cemetery, I know, a little creepy, but I had gone there to visit Lily, you know, the girl I mentioned? Anyway, we'd just got done and Lily returned to where-ever she is now, and then I thought I had seen something gold. Like, my wings. I found Mars, that's his nickname and what I call him, and we just hit it off, especially after I found out he could try and force his thoughts into my head. How weird, we pretty much - almost - had an entire conversation in our heads. That's not weird. >.>
What else, but yeah, Mars is here now, he has his own room, and I'm personally psyched to have him around. Not only am I helping teach him everything that we can do, but he's giving me tips on those damn human emotions. Like the ones I can't grasp quite right, though I'm holding off on love for awhile, I'm already confused with that area as it is. As it is, Mars is staying here with me, and I am so glad that he is. I've even written more powerful anti-demon sigils on the walls and windows to make sure we won't be bothered. Especially since there's two of us now, but at least we don't leave a scent. That's always reassuring to an extent. Then there's Azrael, but I'm not going to think about him right now, he just brings me too much confusion, you know? Nevermind...
I've also found myself thinking a lot about my mother, how she was prisoner to my father, and about the contract.
[taped into the diary page is a small, folded up latter, worn from decades]
My Pandora,
Hello my baby daughter. I hope you are faring well, you look absolutely beautiful, even now as I cradle you in my other arm as I write you this. You're not even a week old, and your eyes are always watching the world around you, watching how my hand moves as I write this to you, my beautiful daughter. You have eyes like me and your father, my brown eyes that turn black when my wings appeared, and your green eye like her father. Quite unusual, isn't it? At least you have that little piece of us to take with you throughout your lifetime my dear. Have I told you I love you in this yet, Pandora? I believe not, then I shall say it again, I love you, my dear Pandora, and I always will, even if I should die before I get to see you grow up, I want you to know that I will find a way to see you grow up and become the woman I know you will become.
You see, your father, he has me here, but though I can get to everything that I need, now that you're here, I'm not sure what will happen, you grow so fast, you already look like you're about 5 months old instead of just about a week. That's why I fear for you, if you do happen to go to school like other children for awhile, they make point fingers and whisper, but always know this, you are better, you are stronger. You do not let them bring you down, you are powerful, much more powerful than they could ever imagine.
I love you my Pandora.
[/size] with love,
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